LBS Diaries Part 17 - Shit Happens!

Disclaimer: This post contains some disturbing synonyms of poop and even more disturbing associated scenarios. Reader's discretion is advised.


So post the Cross Country race, the regular good old classroom sessions are back yet again to kill us softly. And as we are soon to embark upon the much talked about Village Visit, a series of sensitization lectures are in full swing. And today we had the privilege of having the Mission Director of the Swachcha Bharat Abhiyaan at LBS NAA. This made sense as we are supposed to run a similar campaign in the villages where we would be staying for a week. Now what would you expect from a session planned on the Swachcha Bharat Mission? That we would be told about the various projects that this grand programme comprises of, that we would be told about the myriad predicaments and that we would be shown the ground realities and of course the current status of the whole mission. And perhaps little pondering over the question how these prevailing loopholes can be addressed. But hey, we were in for a "shitty" surprise.

The special lecture started with the question Why should we do this? Simple enough right. Rhetorical answers were thrown in from all directions which had some innovative ones as well like "So that OTs can have a clean trek route and do not step on land mines!". To exemplify it to us, he actually had planned something of his own.. He first offered a glass of water to random OTs who gracefully accepted the offer perhaps in an attempt to stay awake. But then comes the weird part. He then takes out some yellow substance from a bag and puts it in the water. Now of course, no one would accept that questionable liquid thus exemplifying his point that our awareness prohibits us in this case. I don't know how effective that act was but boy i am still wondering what that yellow thing was?

That was not all. Then we were asked to deal with a real life situation. Imagine if someone makes a poop right in the middle of the stage of this auditorium, how would it really affect you? God, that's a real puzzler. What shit! But this wasn't the creative part. Now imagine some flies from outside pounce upon it. BTW how much do you think an average poop weighs? Someone very confidently shouted from the crowd "300 gms!". Such confidence in that voice. Are there some commodes equipped with weighing apparatus? Silver woods hi ho sakta hai! Anyways, then imagine the fly sits on the monument that we just erected. On each of it's leg, one gram of the delicacy is glued. Thus the flies are roaming with missiles worth six grams of ammunition. Is this enough to make you ill. And then we remembered that cancer awareness video "इतना टार आपको बीमार, बहुत बहुत बीमार बना सकता है। ". Of course, in place of taar, we had tatti!

Then the question why we haven't achieved these objectives? Is it because of the bureaucratic apathy, absence of political will or our inability to alter behavioral patterns. Or perhaps it is way cool to shit out in the open. But the stats are embarassing. 60% of Indians are still doing open defecation, 1000 kids are dying of diarrhea everyday, various cases of exploitation of women. These are difficult to take and the new campaign is showing some promises. Let's hope the current initiatives prove to be effective down the line. Ironically, so much "shit" talk that we digested today, might motivate us to actively take part in this quintessential mission.  This lecture surely made the point clear that how shitty this whole shit affair is.

Lastly I would like to quote something which was misquoted during the session that made us LOL, ROFL and LMAO. "सबका हाथ, सबका विकास!"