Alice in Wonderland 3D *

OMFG ! Yes, that will be your exact reaction after watching this horrible horrible ( repetition intended ) dark depiction of the tale that once fascinated children across the world.I believe many would have planned to see this one for the holy trinity of Tim Burton, Johnny Depp(Mad Hatter) and Helena Bonham Carter(Red Queen).I did too. And for the love of God, if you want to keep it holy, stay miles from this disaster.

Tim, whom did you make this one for.The kids-I don't think so.Dark adaptation with a not-so-cute Alice and an over-dramatic Red queen.There were simply no cute-flower moments for the kids.The Johnny Depp fans-Well just dressing up Depp in some funny makeup and costume, making him walk like Jack Sparrow and not giving him any space to showcase what he has got, doesn't make his fans happy.And this one is a general statement-If you ain't have stuff for 3D, don't freaking call it 3D.

The only solace is Helena Carter's bitching performance as the Red queen.Nothing new done by Burton.We all know the story right.So save your money,time and popcorn for any other flick. Stay back people, don't fall into this hole, there isn't a wonderland here. Depp was just a trap. Like Katrina is, in our bollywood.

Cheers :)

Jhoota hi Sahi * *

We have always been moved by the light romantic comedy flicks from the west like Notting Hill,When Harry met Sally,Love actually and so on. This is our answer, in our style.'Jhoota hi sahi' is about a loser(Sid>John) who stammers when he sees beautiful women.Well let's be frank here fellow Indian men, who doesn't.Anyways, he has a girlfriend who is more like a mommy manipulating him always.He is not in love with her although he thinks otherwise given his stammering comes to a halt when she's around. His friend circle-a Pakistani(Raghu), living with her knocked-up sister, who has a Japanese boyfriend,who proposes her everyday with his amusing ways.They all are friends with a gay, who brings a new boyfriend every now and then.And our protagonist and his Pakistani friends also have a pervert in their shop where they sell Indian Books and they do not do Deepak Chopra.What more can you ask for?

One night Sid gets a call from a suicidal person on the verge of ending his life.Sid tries his best to convince him not to.Later it turns out his number was accidentally printed in 'Suicide helpline for Indians' ad.He himself becomes a volunteer and then gets a call from Mishka(female lead).He talks to her all the time and becomes her confidant.But fortunately or unfortunately, she visits his book shop and confronts Sid.Now Sid, and Sid over the phone are two different persons for her.To make Sid look good, 'Sid over the phone' starts a lie-game.It's fun to see everything falling apart for Sid.There are some very funny moments in the movie and the one-liners are just awesomely hilarious.A new for our flicks.

If you are a romantic person at heart, you will enjoy the flow and the cuteness.Except for the typical bollywood style end.Even if there if no possibility to put some thrill, Indian directors have this in-built thing to incorporate that.To sum up, watch it for- Raghu's one liners,Raghu's expressions,John's out of the world cuteness(Yes girls, this one is for you!),few good songs and the overall feel.

P.S. Avoid a seat near a bunch of John-is-so-cute-obsessed-girls.

Like a Lover!

She messaged,' You have got mail!',
I smiled, like a child,
waiting for his gift.

What did she send ?
A card, poem or prose,
I can't wait anymore.
Cruised home so fast,
on thoughts so lost.

It's her pictures.
I smiled, like a lover.
Look at her hair, so curvy,
and her eyes so enticing,
her glow,her presence so divine.

It's her PICTURES!
I wept, like a lover.
It's been so long dear.
So damn long!
But I believe things will change,
our time will come,
and till then,
I'll wait, like a lover.

The Silent worker

We often gossip on the rich & famous about what they recently tweeted, whom they are dating lately and blah blah. We seldom talk about commoners who are not that fortunate.About people who question their fate everyday when they wake up and realize that it was not a bad dream but the hard truth.It's actually they who need our attention, our concern and much more.But the world is full of irony.

There is person I have immense respect for. For his tolerance, persistence and the lively spirit within him.He's retired now.Although he keeps himself occupied with some other work.Keeps him going.His wife, met an accident around five years ago.She was the only person in that bus to get severely injured.She has been on the bed since.Sometimes we cannot explain why bad things happen to us. And others simply can never feel what we feel when we are hurt.But everything happens for a reason.We, as humans are too dumb to understand the big picture.Sometimes it happens so that we can learn a lesson.Sometimes , to test your strength.Most times, you cannot decode why.But that does not mean it happened in vain.Stop looking for that answer.That will come to you when the time is right.You should do your karma without expectations.And why do you say there is no ray of hope? If you think about it, the ray of hope is an entity which comes into existence from our own actions.It's like a reaction. You can always create one because without it, life becomes dull.

For the last five years, he has looked after her.He has comforted her like a mother does to her newly born child.Cleaning her everyday, making her sit on the wheel-chair, moving her back to the bed every night.It takes immense will power to do this everyday for such a long time.I just cannot imagine someone so strong at heart.This was no one's fault.But often they break into tears. She too, has been so strong since. She tries to do all that she can. She has got the kitchen slab lowered so that she can cook from her wheel-chair.She moves here and there cleaning the house.When he used to go to office, she would even polish his shoes sitting on the wheel chair. It's amazing to see someone do all this sitting on the wheel chair.

For him I want to say, be firm.That's what your name means.For both of you, I have immense respect.We all are with you in this, you are not alone.This is to all such silent workers.Respect.

Mallika, Hissed !

Mumbai. The bollywood hottie Mallika Sherawat, who is in news these days with her forth-coming release 'Hiss', was found unconscious at her Juhu Residence and was taken to Lilawati Hospital where she was diagnosed with multiple snake-bites. The doctors said," She has got an amazing body! ( lost in lust) .. ahem .. i mean ...even after several snake-bites, she's doing well. Still we are looking forward to closely monitor her body... i mean monitor her ".

Mumbai police on raiding her apartment, was dumbstruck to find more than dozen snakes hissing around.On realizing human presence, they escaped.Puzzled by these turn of events, when the famous veterinary psychologist Cyrus was contacted by the Police, he said,"Although i specialize in goat psychology, i think i know what happened here. The snakes probably got pissed off with the director picking Mallika to play a snake. They might have felt offended with this insult to their species."

However, Rakhi Sawant who was also considered for the role, had something different to add. "It's just a publicity stunt she is putting.Mujhe lete to ye sab natak karne ki zaroorat nahi hoti. Aakhir mujse jyada zeher hai kisime ?", she tweeted. Whatever may be the truth, the producer of the movie is excited with all the free publicity he has got."We had planned a wardrobe-malfunction for Mallika in the 'Hiss' Promotion party, but i guess, we are done with publicity.I heard it's already creating Oscar buzz.We all want Mallika to get well, but if she dies, she might pull off a Heath Ledger.Some thing to look forward too".

Salman to Star in Avatar sequel

Mumbai.Salman Khan is on a roll and he has all the good reasons this time. Lately people have been wondering why is he sporting a 'Being Na'vi' T-shirt instead of his ironical regular wear 'Being Human' . The answer to this question is surely going to create ripples in the tabloid. If sources are to be believed, James Cameron, the legendary director of 'Avatar' is in talks with Salman Khan to bring him on board for his much anticipated under-water Avatar sequel.

Impressed by the massive success of 'Dabangg' and the out-standing portrayal of 'Chulbul Pandey' by Sallu, Cameron is currently in Mumbai for finalizing his cast for the sequel.Salman Khan, who feels honoured by this gesture from Cameron is more than willing to become a part of this grand project.But it seems he is having a hard time figuring out dates, as he has already given his commitment to Most Wanted, Almost Wanted, Atmost Wanted, Dabangg 2 and Dabanggg 3.

On the other hand, James Cameron is confident that the issue would be resolved and he will have Salman hopping on as he has already agreed to Sallu's wish list. He said in a press conference," Salman has asked me to offer some roles to his two bothers and an item song to Malaika Arora Khan. I told him that he need not mention, I figured this would be coming and was prepared.I am thrilled to get started on this.". On being asked about Malaika's role, he in his tooty-footy hindi said,"Let just say, Munni fir the bad naam hogi!" and then he burst into laughter. Adding to the buzz, actor Rajnikanth claimed that he was approached for this role first but their ideologies were light years apart.Cameron refused to comment on this.If all goes well, he would be releasing this in summer 2011 hoping not to get beaten again by his ex-wife this coming Oscars.